Tim Tebow Super Bowl Ad - Absolute Genius!

Did you see the Tim Tebow Super Bowl Ad? Absolute genius!

Groups jumping up and down screaming about CBS daring to run a pro-life add during the "Big Game" had people sitting there just waiting for it to be played.

And when it was, people got an ad that said nothing that would allow the pro-choice crowd to scream foul over or tear apart. But it didn't need to. After the unbelievable amount of attention given the story in the last week or so, everyone knew the punch-line - the game was already over. The message was delivered before commercial ever ran. A marvelous piece of misdirection.

It would have been great if at the end Mr. Tebow would have looked at the camera and gave it a little wink.

Tim Staples is Coming - Nota Bene!

Calling Catholic Men!

Protecting Your Family from the

Problem of Pornography

Saturday February 6, 2010

St. Michael Catholic Church

St. Michael, MN

10:00 AM to 1:00 PM

*Mass will be celebrated before by Bishop Piche.*

Featuring world-renowned Catholic speaker

Tim Staples (from Catholic Answers)

Presentation to include:

How we got to this point in the U.S.

Effects of the porn culture on families and society

The proliferation of the internet

Computer security tips

Also available:

Saturday morning Mass at 8:00 AM

Eucharistic Adoration from 9:00 AM

Confession at 3:00 PMLearn how to defend your chastity & your family

This event is free. Rolls, juice and coffee provided from 9:00 AM. Donations are appreciated to defray costs. RSVP by email is requested but not required: nb@kc4174.org

Email nb@kc4174.org for more information, or call the St. Michael Catholic Church office 763-497-2745.

"I believe that it has done me good,..."

"Dickens rescued Christmas from the Puritans."
~ G.K. Chesterton

From Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol:

"A merry Christmas, uncle! God save you!" cried a cheerful voice. It was the voice of Scrooge's nephew, who came upon him so quickly that this was the first intimation he had of his approach.

"Bah!" said Scrooge, "Humbug!"

He had so heated himself with rapid walking in the fog and frost, this nephew of Scrooge's, that he was all in a glow; his face was ruddy and handsome; his eyes sparkled, and his breath smoked again.

"Christmas a humbug, uncle!" said Scrooge's nephew. "You don't mean that, I am sure."

"I do," said Scrooge. "Merry Christmas! What right have you to be merry? what reason have you to be merry? You're poor enough."

"Come, then," returned the nephew gaily. "What right have you to be dismal? what reason have you to be morose? You're rich enough."

Scrooge having no better answer ready on the spur of the moment, said, "Bah!" again; and followed it up with "Humbug."

"Don't be cross, uncle," said the nephew.

"What else can I be," returned the uncle, "when I live in such a world of fools as this Merry Christmas! Out upon merry Christmas. What's Christmas time to you but a time for paying bills without money; a time for finding yourself a year older, but not an hour richer; a time for balancing your books and having every item in 'em through a round dozen of months presented dead against you? If I could work my will," said Scrooge indignantly, "every idiot who goes about with "Merry Christmas" on his lips, should be boiled with his own pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. He should!"

"Uncle!" pleaded the nephew.

"Nephew!" returned the uncle, sternly, "keep Christmas in your own way, and let me keep it in mine."

"Keep it!" repeated Scrooge's nephew. "But you don't keep it."

"Let me leave it alone, then," said Scrooge. "Much good may it do you! Much good it has ever done you!"

"There are many things from which I might have derived good, by which I have not profited, I dare say," returned the nephew: "Christmas among the rest. But I am sure I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round - apart from the veneration due to its sacred name and origin, if anything belonging to it can be apart from that - as a good time: a kind, forgiving, charitable, pleasant time: the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow-passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys. And therefore, uncle, though it has never put a scrap of gold or silver in my pocket, I believe that it has done me good, and will do me good; and I say, God bless it!"

“Untouchables”

The Anti-Life crowd has really already won a very important victory with or without the passing of a Health Care Reform bill which would include public funding for abortion.

Shifting the debate from the legality of murdering a child to whether or not that murder should be funded by the taxpayers is a major setback for the Pro-Life movement. And I'm not sure emough people are aware of that.

Recognizing we don't always get to choose the lines of battle, I pray that Congressman Bart Stupak resists any attempts to intimidate or bribe him as the nation's focus now falls back onto the House.

What we need now more than ever is another Eliot Ness and a group of “Untouchables” in the House and Senate - men and women with integrity, without fear, and without a price.

Catholic Men

I honestly believe that for men to live as true men, they must either be waging war or preparing for it - for sake of God, family, or country. How a Catholic man should conduct himself has certainly gone through different stages over the last 20 centuries; from the hermit, to the knight, to the modern day "get-together-and-tearfully-bear-my-soul-with-strangers" man.

Without a clear concept of what real manliness is today many men are eager to wage war, but only as an avatar in the distant land of Azeroth (WoW) or in some other digital online gaming world doing battle against a make believe foe. These men sink ridiculous numbers of hours every week into fleeing from the real battles of this world and engaging in the safe and meaningless battles of online gaming.

They have been effectively emasculated and neutralized through their decision to spend their free time fighting fantasy orcs, trolls, and dwarves while the real evil of this world is left unchecked. People can and do enjoy these games in moderation, but the games today are designed more and more to make this the exception and not the rule. More about this in a later post.

So then what is the ideal of Catholic Manhood? What does rightly ordered masculinity look like, and where have all the "good men" gone?

Our Secret Place?

I have no plans on any regular posts regarding the music played at Mass at my parish. But I think the issue is in no way limited to my parish and in fact is an issue that is prevalent in Contemporary Christian music at large.

Tonight we sang the song Your Love is Extravagant which was written by Darrell Evans. Below are some of the lyrics to the song.

Your Love is Extravagant

Your love (Your love) is extravagant,
Your friendship (ooo) mm -so intimate;
I feel I'm moving to the rythm of Your grace,
Your fragrance is intoxicating in our secret place;
Your love (Your love) is extravagant.

Wow, that was hot.

Now I am aware that great Catholic Saints have used intimate and sometimes erotic language in the past to describe union with God not to mention the Song of Songs. I get that, but I don't think Contemporary Christian music falls into this category. The Song of Songs is an inspired book of the Bible and the writings of the Saints flowed from personal experience with and promptings by the Spirit. While this song does have a nice melody, I'm not sure it fits into the same category.

As a man I feel uncomfortable expressing my appreciation of Christ's love with ooo's and mmm's, and with talk of intoxicating fragrances and secret places. Jesus was not only God almighty, but also a man - a real life man with all the trimmings. Jesus is fully God and fully Man - still.

And I can't help but wonder if suggestive, sensual songs involving the Blessed Virgin Mary's love for us or popular art depicting her with a figure are very far off. Would this be inappropriate? Would that be a double-standard?

The Warmth of Your Embrace?

The youth choir sang at Mass last night - they did a great job. The song they sang during the preparation of the gifts was the Katina's Draw Me Close. Below are the lyrics.

Draw Me Close
Draw me close to You
Never let me go
I lay it all down again
To hear You say that I'm Your friend

You are my desire
No one else will do
'Cause no one else can take Your place
To feel the warmth
of Your embrace
Help me find a way
Bring me back to You

You're all I want
You're all I've ever needed
You're all I want
Help me know You are near

Listening to the words, I began to form an image of Jesus "drawing me close", pressing me into his big, strong, hairy-chest. There I was "feeling the warmth of His embrace", and I couldn't help but notice how the whole song's imagery seemed awfully, well, feminine.

I really hope heaven isn't like that, because that would be really awkward. I've never thought of Jesus as a hugger. I mean I'm sure he hugs babies, and little kids all the time, and probably women too, but I'm going to go out on a limb here d have to guess He'd opt for a knuckle bump from the fellas.

Don't get me wrong I know Jesus loves me, and my wife assures me that he's going to hug me if I do get to heaven (if for no other reason than for this post). I'm just sometimes surprised how some of these songs seem to be written in such a way that they can be sung to Jesus or to a wife/girlfriend.

But like I said, the youth choir did do a nice job.

Practical Universalism

Christian Universalism is the belief that all people will be eventually reconciled to God. Universalism’s fault is not in the truth it affirms, but in the truth it denies. The idea of universal reconciliation is a result of affirming God’s love and mercy to the point of denying His justice; reward without judgement, a Heaven without a Hell. “How could an all-loving God sentence one of His children to eternal damnation"?

To correctly understand light, you need some concept of darkness. Warmth is appreciated most by those who have an understanding of coldness. True knowledge of joy, requires a familiarity with sorrow. And an understanding, appreciation, and knowledge of mercy require it be considered in the context of justice. And a divine mercy can only be fully conceived if considered against a backdrop of divine justice.

Universalism creates the conditions necessary for its own growth and spread. To emphasize God’s love and ignore His justice makes it difficult to see how any action on our part could result in eternal punishment. People begin talking more and more about the mercy of God and how much He loves us, and less about the radical reality of the human will to reject God and place itself under the justice of God. The cycle is fueled by our society’s love of self and loathing of responsibility.

Jacques Maritain described practical atheists as those who, "believe that they believe in God but in reality deny His existence by each one of their deeds." And I think you could describe a practical Universalist as those who, "believe that they believe in Hell but in reality deny its existence by each one of their deeds." A person who would could imagine such a place but not a path leading to it.

I hear a lot about people wanting to "reach out to people and meet them where they’re at" lately. Great! I’m all for whatever that means as long as the meeting includes talk of both sin and blessing, both death and resurrection, both repentance and redemption … and both justice and mercy.

The Divine Paradox

"Out of the darkness of my life, so much frustrated, I put before you the one great thing to love on earth, the blessed sacrament. There you will find romance, glory, honour, fidelity and the true way of all your loves on earth. And more than that, death. For the divine paradox, that which ends life and demands the surrender of all, and yet by the taste or foretaste of which alone, can what you seek in your earthly relationships: love, faithfulness, joy, be maintained or take on that complexion of reality of eternal endurance which every man's heart desires."

~J. R. R. Tolkien

Why Bother with the Facts?

The LA Times is running an article (House votes for ban on abortion subsidies) written by Kim Geiger which covers the passing of the Stupak amendment. The article contains the following paragraphs:

The compromise won immediate support from the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, which urged Catholics to "lend their full-throated support" to the Democrats' healthcare bill.

"The bishops' stamp of approval means that this bill is unambiguously pro-life and we will vigorously oppose those who suggest otherwise," the conference said in a statement Saturday.

A little concerned that the USCCB would give such a strong statement urging Catholics to lend not only thier support, but their "full-throated" support, I set out trying to find a source. And guess what - I did.

On the website for an organization named Catholics United, I found the source of the quotes above:

“Catholics across the political spectrum should lend their full-throated support to this legislation,” said Korzen. “The bishops' stamp of approval means that this bill is unambiguously pro-life, and we will vigorously oppose those who suggest otherwise.”

Who is the Korzen referenced above? Chris Korzen is the Executive Director of Catholic United, an organization with a history of working to undermine Catholic Social teachings - not promote them. Whether Ms. Geiger's poor journalism is due to ignorance or more sinister motives I have no idea, but to attribute the statement to the USCCB is misleading and damaging.

And with all due respect to our Bishops, the reason groups like this can make statements on your behalf is because when you do speak it's often not strong enough, not loud enough, or not timely enough.

And unlike the LA Times, I'll do more than give misleading quotes:

Catholics United Threatens Churches, Pastors Over Pro-Life Literature Drops
Catholics United targets Archbishop Naumann, defends Gov. Sebelius
Catholics United praises Sen. Snowe vote while U.S. bishops express concern

The USCCB, The Democrats, and Health Care Reform

A fable (The Horse, Hunter and Stag) by Aesop:

A quarrel had arisen between the Horse and the Stag, so the Horse came to a Hunter to ask his help to take revenge on the Stag. The Hunter agreed, but said: "If you desire to conquer the Stag, you must permit me to place this piece of iron between your jaws, so that I may guide you with these reins, and allow this saddle to be placed upon your back so that I may keep steady upon you as we follow after the enemy." The Horse agreed to the conditions, and the Hunter soon saddled and bridled him. Then with the aid of the Hunter the Horse soon overcame the Stag, and said to the Hunter: "Now, get off, and remove those things from my mouth and back."

"Not so fast, friend," said the Hunter. "I have now got you under bit and spur, and prefer to keep you as you are at present."

If you allow men to use you for your own purposes, they will use you for theirs.

---

The USCCB is not happy with the Democrats' health care bill including "abortion funding & mandates". Lots of information about it on their website. Guess the most surprising part of it for me is that they seem ... surprised.

In a flyer they distributed nationally this weekend they state, "The bills will have to change or the bishops have pledged to oppose them." I'm afraid this threat may not carry the same weight it should or once may have. Especially with statements such as the following on their website,

"...the bishops have asked that health care reform be “abortion neutral,” this is, that existing laws and policies with regard to abortion and abortion funding be preserved, ..."

Saints Athanasius and Augustine, pray for us.

To Avoid Dressing Like A Clown [Repost]

*Due to the recent comments dealing with blogging pseudo-names, I thought this old post may be of some value to the discussion. Some may use these names to "hide" behind, but to make that assumption about everyone may be painting a bit broadly.

The question of what “name” to use when blogging may not seem like something that would require much thought - until you have to choose one. I'd say that there are two general schools of thought here.

The first school’s thinking is to use the most natural option, their real name (or is some form of it). The second is to use a name that is not their real name, in a way hiding their identity from the world.

Many people see a certain cowardice in not using their real name. I can understand this, but I don't think I completely agree. A person using a pseudo name to hide their identity to be uncharitable and vicious would deserve the label of coward, but anonymity can serve another less shady purpose.

In the first chapter of Cardinal Ratzinger’s (Pope Benedict XVI) book An Introduction to Christianity, he retells Soren Kierkegaard’s famous story of the clown and the burning village:

“According to this story a traveling circus in Denmark had caught fire. The manager thereupon sent the clown, who was already dressed and made-up for the performance, into the neighboring village to fetch help, especially as there was a danger that the fire would spread across the fields of dry stubble and engulf the village itself. The clown hurried into the village and requested the inhabitants to come as quickly as possible to the blazing circus and help to put the fire out. But the villagers took the clown’s shouts simply for an excellent piece of advertising, meant to attract as many people as possible to the performance; they applauded the clown and laughed till they cried. The clown felt more like weeping than laughing; he tried in vain to get people to be serious, to make it clear to them that it was no trick but bitter earnest, that there really was a fire. His supplications only increased the laughter; people thought he was playing his part splendidly – until finally the fire did engulf the village, it was too late for help and both circus and village were burned to the ground.”

Don’t read into everyone dying at the end because they didn’t listen to the clown part – that’s not the point of my post. My point is that anonymity can allow a person to write without having to worry about other’s perceptions clouding the message. Once others have formed an opinion of a person, that person’s words and thoughts will forever be shaped be those opinions.

If people see you “dressed like a clown”, they tend to see your actions and hear your words accordingly. It's unfortunate, but that’s just how it is. And when it happens, as the clown, you truly feel more like weeping than laughing.

Nota Bene Series - Gay Marriage: The Battle for the Wrong Right.

Time for round two.

The topic for the next Nota Bene Series will be "Gay Marriage: The Battle for the Wrong Right."

It will be held on June 15th, and will begin once again with a free meal staring at 6:30 PM. The evening will be held at the parish of St. Michael's Gathering Space in St Michael, Minnesota.

Follow this link to view a teaser video on the topic and more information on how to RSVP.

And as always, all men are invited.

Following the Moral Precepts of Liberals

The following is taken from a piece written by the every edgy, controversial, and witty Ann Coulter:

Tiller was protected not only by a praetorian guard of elected Democrats, but also by the protective coloration of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America -- coincidentally, the same church belonged to by Tiller's fellow Wichita executioner, the BTK killer.

The official Web page of the ELCA instructs: "A developing life in the womb does not have an absolute right to be born." As long as we're deciding who does and doesn't have an "absolute right to be born," who's to say late-term abortionists have an "absolute right" to live?

I wouldn't kill an abortionist myself, but I wouldn't want to impose my moral values on others. No one is for shooting abortionists. But how will criminalizing men making difficult, often tragic, decisions be an effective means of achieving the goal of reducing the shootings of abortionists?

Following the moral precepts of liberals, I believe the correct position is: If you don't believe in shooting abortionists, then don't shoot one.

And from the website of the ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America):

The topic of abortion evokes strong and varied convictions about the social order, the roles of women and men, human life and human responsibility, freedom and limits, sexual morality, and the significance of children in our lives. It involves powerful feelings that are based on different life experiences and interpretations of Christian faith and life in the world. If we are to take our differences seriously, we must learn how to talk about them in ways that do justice to our diversity.

The language used in discussing abortion should ignore neither the value of unborn life nor the value of the woman and her other relationships. It should either obscure the moral seriousness of the decision faced by the woman nor hide the moral value of the newly conceived life. Nor is it helpful to use the language of "rights" in absolute ways that imply that no other significant moral claims intrude. A developing life in the womb does not have an absolute right to be born, nor does a pregnant woman have an absolute right to terminate a pregnancy. The concern for both the life of the woman and the developing life in her womb expresses a common commitment to life. This requires that we move beyond the usual "pro-life" versus "pro-choice" language in discussing abortion.

Politics influencing Christian doctrine has become much more common than Christian doctrine influencing politics. And any creed who favors an adherence to the popular politics of the day is doomed to be caught in an eddy of irrelevance and incredibility; possibly allowed to speak with heartfelt conviction, but never again with any moral authority. Politics (whether right or left) influencing doctrine is a dangerous, and Christianity will always ultimately be the one who suffers.

Chesterton on Marriage and Fidelity

"Keeping to one woman is a small price for so much as seeing one woman. To complain that I could only be married once was like complaining that I had only been born once. It was incommensurate with the terrible excitement of which one was talking. It showed, not an exaggerated sensibility to sex, but a curious insensibility to it. A man is a fool who complains that he cannot enter Eden by five gates at once."

— G.K. Chesterton, Orthodoxy

Pray For America This Memorial Day

Remembering today the American soldiers who lost their lives fighting for us. Examples of combat deaths include:

American Revolution... 8,000
U.S. Civil War (Union)... 140,000
World War I... 53,000
World War II... 290,000
Korean War... 31,000
Vietnam War... 47,000
Gulf War... 148
Iraq/Afghanistan... 4,200

Without debating the just cause of any particular conflict, it is unmistakable that America has been blessed by wise founders and Providential success, and we remain humanity's best hope of democracy and freedom.

But, we have our problems. We are still wrestling with the aftermath of legalized human slavery, even after a civil war which claimed over 200,000 lives including a President. Those wounds in fact are not healed, and the scab is continuously scraped off thanks to a dysfunctional welfare state that has destroyed the Black family unit in America. It is obscene.

And, there is abortion.

Abortion (1973-present)... 50,000,000

Since Roe v Wade, the number of abortion deaths in the U.S. is nearly 90 times the number of wartime deaths cited above, and within the next decade it will top 100 X. According to the Guttmacher Institute (an arm of Planned Parenthood and thus no friend of the fetus), 22% of all pregancies in the U.S. end in abortion. This is horrific and disheartening.

I will tout the greatness of America with the slightest provocation. But, we are squandering this capital as we turn away from God and the Church. In a recent video publication, Father John Corapi asserts that America will "get nothing right" unless and until we eradicate abortion. I believe he is correct.

God, bless America.

Rest In Peace, John Kortuem

Last week a friend of many in St Michael passed away, John Kortuem. He was a huge man, 6'8" and three and a half bills. Father Michael gave a touching and poignant homily at the Funeral Mass, recounting John's life, faith, size, strength and his occasional foibles.

I was in John's CRHP group, and was honored to have been a pall bearer at his funeral. And, John's son is a key reason I finally took the Tiberian plunge and joined the Church. John's gentleness and faithfulness, and his devotion to the Eucharist and the Blessed Virgin, were undoubtedly passed on to his children.

And so I know if it weren't for John Kortuem, I might still be lost.

Pray for John's soul, and for the comfort and consolation of his family.

Without swords, without guns, without conflict ...

If you listen carefully, you can hear what remains of the West strain under the weight of its own selfishness. No longer supported by a once solid foundation, its collapse seems all but certain. It would be a mistake to say this collapse is inevitable, but without something short of divine the writing is on the wall.

Today we in the West have for the most part built our lives on the beautiful value of selfishness. People now refuse children knowing that it would mean having to share what they have; home, money, future, time, life, etc. Parents today were born to parents who wanted – and did – give them everything they wanted, and they have no interest in giving that up.

The arguments are over where in the “game” you should be allowed to make sure the children are never born - contraception and abortion. The fact that they shouldn’t be born is a given. In our country the native population has a fertility rate of 1.8. It’s sick to think that with the acceptance of abortion and even late-term abortion that the .8 could be barbarically accurate. How much credibility can people with 1.8 kids possibly have when they speak out against abortion? Seriously.

In this climate, marriage fades away as husbands and wives see each other less as spouses and more and more as sexual playmates. They soon realize that when they’re not having fun, it’s easier to take your toys and go home than it is to actually make a home.

It’s not uncommon to hear people talk about how God is going to punish the United States. “If God does not judge America He will have to apologize to Sodom and Gomorrah” is a phrase attributed to just about every religious leader in the last 50 years. Will this great chastisement be a tsunami? An earthquake? A nuclear weapon detonated by a terrorist?!?! Maybe, and in the end something like that just might drive people back to God and to faith.

Unfortunately, I think the chastisement may come in a form not so easily recognized. An external catastrophe has a way of turning people’s eyes from themselves outward to others. Illuminated by the light of charity, the person now can see the world in a new light – the way it really is. But when the chastisement is for God to hand people “over to impurity through the lusts of their hearts for the mutual degradation of their bodies”, people are allowed to continue in their selfishness to the point of death. The person who is themselves the object of their own desire is a truly vile and miserable creature. We in the West are loving ourselves to death.

Ever since the creation of the world, his invisible attributes of eternal power and divinity have been able to be understood and perceived in what he has made. As a result, they have no excuse; for although they knew God they did not accord him glory as God or give him thanks. Instead, they became vain in their reasoning, and their senseless minds were darkened. While claiming to be wise, they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for the likeness of an image of mortal man or of birds or of four-legged animals or of snakes. Therefore, God handed them over to impurity through the lusts of their hearts for the mutual degradation of their bodies. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie and revered and worshiped the creature rather than the creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.
Romans 1:20-25

To borrow from T.S. Eliot (The Hollow Men):
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
Not with a bang but a whimper.

The Western world that is.

Islam doesn't need swords, guns, or conflict - they can destroy the West with children.

Nota Bene Series

For those interested, the Knights of Columbus council #4174 will be starting a series called the Nota Bene Series. "Nota Bene" is Latin for “Take Notice!” because these meetings will consist of talks and presentations covering current issues Catholic men need to be informed about. It is the hope that these evenings will provide men not only information, but opportunities and suggestions for action.

The first topic will be on the dangers of Socialism. It will be held on April 29th, from 6:00-9:00pm in the Church of St. Michael's Gathering Space - St Michael, Minnesota. Follow this link for directions. The evening will start off with a meal. All men are invited.

Read Thou This ...

... and rejoice that thy brethren are as miserable as thou art:

Lamentations of the Father

Raises the question: Is Scriptural parody a sin?

Didn't Think You Were A Hater, Did You?

If any of you bloggers are military veterans, you might have read or heard of the furor over the recent release of a Department of Homeland Security intelligence assessment of "Rightwing Extremism," in which returning vets are identified as potential future terrorists. The assessment is meant to "facilitate a greater understanding of the phenomenon of violent radicalization in the United States."

But if you're Catholic you might be surprised to fight this passage in the assessment as well:

"Rightwing extremism in the United States can be broadly divided into those groups, movements, and adherents that are primarily hate-oriented (based on hatred of particular religious, racial or ethnic groups), and those that are mainly antigovernment, rejecting federal authority in favor of state or local authority, or rejecting government authority entirely. It may include groups and individuals that are dedicated to a single issue, such as opposition to abortion or immigration."

Pray for our country, our President and other leaders. And pray that watch lists will be limited to terrorists who genuinely want to tear down our nation and our freedom, rather than those holding legitimate dissenting, counter-cultural Catholic viewpoints.

http://wikileaks.org/leak/us-dhs-right-wing-extremism-2009.pdf

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

Callings, Revisited

Blogger's Note: That last post on my other blog garnered some interesting comments, both on- and off-line. Hope this one does, too.

It occurred to me on my commute this morning that there is one aspect of the priestly vocation versus the married vocation that I failed to explore: The possibility of answering one calling, only to hear another years or even decades later.

I know of at least two former Catholic priests who have chosen to leave the priesthood and get married. To the best of my knowledge, one left the Catholic Church and may now be a Protestant minister; the other is the head of one of the most Catholic families I know back home in Michigan.

I know of precisely zero married men who have chosen to leave their marriage to become priests. In neither case do I know what the "rules" are — how one "undoes" one sacramental vow and undertakes a new one, or even if it's possible, within the Catholic Church. I suppose one might do it regardless and seek forgiveness in some way, perhaps.

What is of more interest to me is that it is easier for people to imagine a celibate priest discerning a call to marriage later in life than to imagine a married man discerning a call to the celibate life of a priest. The romantic-triangle buddy comedy Keeping the Faith includes a great scene between a young priest, played by Edward Norton, who is contemplating turning his back on his vows over a girl, and an old priest who declares that falling in love every so often is part of the gig — and just like in marriage, you make a choice to stay faithful to your vows. The scene seems funny, wise, and true.

But why not the other way? I can imagine the possibility of years or even decades of celibacy were I to outlive my wife. (Perhaps even celibacy by my own choice ...) But another calling now? While I'm here, with this other half of me? It's unfathomable.

The question becomes, why is it unfathomable for me to imagine falling so in love with the Church that I would want to leave my married vocation, but it's not unfathomable for me to imagine a priest falling so in love with a woman that he would want to leave the Church? If you knew a man in former situation, would you not think it strange, or even outrageous? But in the latter situation? I suspect most people might be sympathetic.

I wonder if it's not the case that have we been so immersed in popular understandings of sexuality — especially male sexuality — that continence seems unnatural and celibacy, next to impossible. In such a world, it's difficult to imagine anyone who had experienced marital intimacy ever choosing celibacy.

But the discussion returns to a question posed in the last post: Would you leave your spouse if a tragic accident made it necessary for you to spend the rest of your days celibate? Would you stay married and cheat?

If you can imagine one, you can imagine the other. And if you can't imagine a love for God deep enough to forsake all others, perhaps you simply aren't called.